I was getting birthday presents for both my SIL and my daughter (SIL turned 12 today, daughter #3 will be 8 on Sunday) and I just happened to pass by the jewelry section of the store. I love bangles – always have – so I figured I’d give one a try.
Tried another one… that one didn’t fit either.
Same thing with the next, and the next, and the next. I literally tried on every type of bangle they had, and NONE of them would fit.
The thing is, I have a large bone structure. I inherited it from both parents, really. Every family member save one that I know has a large bone structure, regardless of whether we’re talking about my mother’s or father’s side of my family. (And that one family member? Was very sickly as a baby, and is now the dwarf of the family. She’s the shortest and smallest out of all of us.)
So this means that I’ve always had large hands. Even when I was younger and thinner, I had hands that seemed huge to me. Of course, at the time, I thought that losing weight would be the solution to even that problem. But the more I really take a step back and analyze these things, the more I realize that’s just another part and parcel of my Fantasy of Being Thin. Losing weight would not have magically made my hands thin and dainty. That is simply something my hands will never be, regardless of whether I weigh 100, 200, 300, 400 or even more pounds. I will always have large, strong hands, because that’s what my genes have told my body to grow.
And it means that even bangles from the “fat store” (i.e. Evans) don’t fit over my hands. I can’t even get them past my knuckles. And if by some miracle I manage to FORCE a bangle over my knuckles? I can’t get it off again. I’ve been wearing one of my daughter #2′s pink bangles for a couple of weeks now for that very reason. The two youngest ones didn’t believe me when I said I couldn’t get them over my knuckles, so I decided to show them. Bad mistake. I managed to force it over my knuckles and now I can’t get it OFF!!!
But as I was standing there in Primark today, I was increasingly getting frustrated that I couldn’t put these damned things over my hands. And, as I said, it didn’t matter where I get them from. So my frustration wasn’t just borne out of one particular experience, it was a culmination of numerous experiences all resulting in the same thing: I can’t have what I want, because the combination of my hands + babgles just doesn’t compute.
But it’s not the fault of my body. It is not the fault of my size 18* (14 US) body that my KNUCKLES are too big to get a bracelet over them. It’s the fault of the designers who don’t even take variations in BONE STRUCTURE into account, never mind BODY SIZE and SHAPE.
So, after some yoga breathing (or, to be perfectly honest, what I IMAGINE to be yoga breathing), I simply accepted the fact that the bangles were not going to fit me, and went on my merry way. But it was a good reminder for myself – and for all of you out there – that when you’re trying to find clothes, shoes, and even accessories and you’re having problems of one form or another:
It’s not YOUR BODY’S fault. It’s not your fault that designers seem to think there’s only one mold for anything and don’t take variations of ANYTHING into account when doing the actual designing. It doesn’t matter if it’s clothes, shoes, bracelets, or whatever. If it doesn’t fit (or doesn’t fit properly), it’s not your body’s fault.
* – Look for another post soon regarding body size. I’ve got one brewing, but it’s not quite ready yet. You have been warned.